R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
