i jhust puked up my retainher.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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