It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
