I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
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I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
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Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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