just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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