I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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