and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
