remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Randomize