It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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