I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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