Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
