if you like me you must not know who I am
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
