I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
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Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
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Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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