The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
