i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
