Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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