That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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