a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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