What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
