He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
