forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
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