Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
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i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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