She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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