i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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