This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
