Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize