Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize