lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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