This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
