All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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