New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize