At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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