It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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