OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
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That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
you had me at cake vodka
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
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She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
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