I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
