omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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