Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
You know, be my cock's hype man.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
