He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
