You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize