I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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