guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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