I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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