Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize