Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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