I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize