i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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