Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
These 21 People Came Up With Hilarious Excuses For Their Hickies
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.