what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
