I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I have already put on my inside pants.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
