They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
